So, Im currently looking for a job, and so far having not very much luck. Hubby is still in the US, finishing up his school, and I came back here early to get a job in order to prove that I can financially support him whilst he's here applying for a visa. It's a whole long story, but in short I need to have a job that pays a certain amount of money a year, and also a place to live. I've applied for some 28 jobs, and not one. Well, that's not entirely true, I have been to a couple interviews, but no real offers. Which is starting to drive me nuts. And during one interview, the interviewer told me that I struck him as a very intelligent woman and that if I could just really figure out what I really wanted to do, I could go far. Totally struck a nerve, because I don't really truly know what I want to do. So I've applied at jobs as a receptionist, office assistant, secretary and for jobs working in stores. I really don't know what it is I really want to do... all my "dream jobs" are stupid things that I've seen in movies. Like The Devil Wears Prada, I would LOVE that job she has as the assistant. Trouble is, it's fiction. Not to mention that if I really wanted that kind of job, my chances would be soo much more improved if I actually lived in New York, or anywhere like it. You know, a city that actually has a fashion district.
I just wish that I had sat down and really figured out if it is secretary work I want to do, or to be involved (somehow) in fashion and all that. I mean, I can do office work for fashion magazines and all that, but I meant more like "regular" offices. Right now, I'm just applying for everything, and maybe that's not so smart. I mean, if I really knew what I wanted to do, I could focus more on those jobs instead of just taking whatever. I don't want to (continue to) be the person that takes a job, and figures out like four or six or eight months later that "nah, this really wasn't for me after all" and then quits. I've never stayed in a job longer than maybe 14 months in one place, and after that I've just had various assignments through temp agencies. And those vary very much in length, so it's starting to show on my CV that I really have no idea what I want to do, and I don't think a company takes that as a good sign I'll be staying with them for long either. My parents seem to think that it's perfectly okay for me to just take whatever job and then quit if I don't like it. But I hate that, and they don't understand that I can't do that anymore. I'm 27 years old, and I should know by now what I want and all that crap, but I don't. And I don't want to be that person that if a company hires me, they'll always be insecure about my staying power. "Is she gonna stay another week, or leave? It's been six months, will she stay a full year, or leave?". That's what my parents doesn't understand. My mother says that it's okay to leave if you don't feel it, but I'd rather not start at all then if I feel early on that maybe this job isn't what I want but I'll take it anyway. It doesn't work that way. And it's driving me absolutely, certifiably bonkers. So here I am, very dangerously close to 30, still wondering what I'm supposed to be when I grow up?
